the early years


1995 — A personal paradigm shift combines with exciting discoveries with intoxicating results: the descent of the Cat spirit into my consciousness; the switch from the harsh world of synthetic LSD to the organic realm of psilocybin mushrooms; exposure to the mind-bending words of bard Terence McKenna and to the noble and wise Native American spirit; new high tech outdoor gear from the local sports co-op; and solo backpacking in the grand pristine environement of the California High Sierras. There seems to be no end to the potential.

But right from the start a Chironic pain is felt within. I see it only too clearly reflected in the environmental destruction raging around these pockets of untouched wilderness.

Karma is ripe: soon to be cataclismic catalyst, a friend and mentor arrives on the scene.

1997 — Ever increasing levels of inner woundedness and the hand of destiny mix to precipitate a heads-on collision with my precious friend. Then and there the Jaguar arrives, usurping the Puma. The Jaguar Knight is born. I embark on a 'night-sea journey' to retrieve my soul. A journey into the depths of the unconscious that will unfold over 5 years and 3 continents: from timeless deserts to buzzing rainforests, desolate fjords to mountains of thin air; from towering redwoods to twisted junipers, sparkling colibris to black calling crows; from megalithic chambers of Neolithic Europe to Knight Templar churches of the medieval age to prehistoric caves of the American Southwest to pyramids of the Classical Mayas... Under the Hood of the Cobra, Into the Heart of the jaguar.

Along the way an ancient kinship is unveiled and my life’s work, the Mandalã, begins.

2001 — In a landmark ritual in an ancient cave perched on a cliffside of the New Mexico wilderness this personal journey culminates. From the animal kingdom i have recovered my ‘lower-half’; from the mentor in whom it had been invested i have retrieved the ‘upper-half’. Heaven and Earth thus connected i come home to myself.

But Artemis proves the ever unreachable virgin, Apollo the ever unatainable perfection. The Chironic quest never really ends, the walk toward the ancestors never truly stops.